Six of you walked out of here with two quarterbacks. One-QB league. Four points a passing touchdown. That's not depth, that's a blankie — and you paid for it in running backs that are now on somebody else's roster hanging thirty on you in Week 9.
Nine messages on Tuesday morning. The bench crime, the waiver clown, the standings with a verdict on every team, and the ledger of everything since draft night.
Your league is why ten people who should have drifted apart still talk every day from August to January. The trash talk is the point — it just runs out of material. The Booth reads your draft and your rules, writes the story of the night, and hands the group chat something new to argue about.
Roast my draft — free Drafting this weekend? The Booth is waiting →It compiles your league's exact scoring — yardage bonuses, kicker bands, defense tiers, whatever your league invented in 2009 — and grades every pick against that. Not against some standard league that doesn't exist.
On Sleeper a league carries a link to its previous season, so the Booth reads that draft too. Going back for the same player who burned you, taking a kicker early two years running — it has the receipt, with the year on it.
One link, whole league reads it. No accounts, no app, no "what's the password." Screenshot the part about your buddy and put it in the chat where it belongs.
We never run out of fucks to give.
$49, one season. Every week: the matchup that mattered, four more that didn't, and the running ledger of everything your league has done wrong since draft night. Everyone in the league reads free, forever.
Free draft roast first? Paste the link above instead — start here.
The math is an engine — it compiles your scoring rules and grades every pick against the market. The writing is a model with all of that in front of it. Neither one is guessing. More on how it works.
The Booth is built for Sleeper, because that's the only platform that gives us your draft, your rules and your history automatically. Everyone else: paste your draft results and we'll still roast it — here.
Perfect. That's the whole point — the report grades a finished draft.
Yes. It goes after draft decisions and the character flaws they imply, never who anybody is. There's a dial if your league has a kid in it.