No mystery. Here's what it reads, how it decides, and what it won't pretend to do.
Paste your Sleeper league link. The Booth pulls every pick, compiles your league's exact scoring settings, and grades all of it — then writes the report. One shared link; the whole league reads it without signing up for anything. You draft Saturday, you read it Saturday night.
Every pick is measured against where the market actually valued that player, and the value is computed in your scoring — per-yard decimals, yardage-game bonuses, kicker distance bands, defense tiers, whatever your league invented in 2009 and never revisited. Grades are curved across your league, so the letters mean something and somebody always eats the F. When the Booth says a pick cost fourteen points, that number is real and your league's numbers guy can check it.
Everybody else grades you team by team, which is twelve paragraphs saying the same thing twelve ways — read three and you have read all of them. The Booth reads the draft as one night. The run that started at pick four and did not stop for twenty picks. The player the whole room walked past forty-five separate times. Who took what out from under whom. And because Sleeper leagues carry a link to the season before, it reads last year's draft too — going back for the same player who burned you comes with a year attached. The grades sit underneath all of it, one line each, because the story is the part somebody actually forwards to the group chat.
There used to be a dial — a polite rung, a default rung, and one with the bleep taken off. It is gone, and not because anybody complained: a choice between three heats is a question asked before you have read a word, and the answer everybody wanted was the one at the end. So the Booth writes in one register and it is not the polite one. It goes after draft decisions and the character flaws they imply — it will absolutely suggest somebody doesn't unload the dishwasher. It won't touch anything nobody chose, and it swears like the group chat it is written for.
Sleeper is the only platform that hands us your draft, your scoring rules and your league's history automatically, and those three things are the entire product. Rather than half-work everywhere, the Booth works completely in one place. ESPN, Yahoo, CBS and the rest: a paste-your-draft-results version is the next thing worth building, and it is not built yet.
Every shape below has had a real report generated through it, start to finish.
| League size | 8, 10, 12 and 14 teams |
| Quarterbacks | One-QB and Superflex |
| Receptions | Full PPR and half PPR |
| Passing TDs | Four points and six points |
| Tight end premium | Yes |
| Kickers and defense | With or without either |
| Draft length | 13 to 30 rounds |
Not limitations we're embarrassed about. Grades built on the wrong market are worse than no grades, so if your league is one of these the Booth says so by name rather than inventing a number.
Auction drafts. Every grade here is built on where a player went versus where the market had him. An auction has no rounds and no pick numbers — it has dollars. We'd rather say so than invent a draft slot and roast you off it.
Rookie and dynasty drafts. Graded against rookie value; our board prices for redraft. We'd be marking your picks against a market that has nothing to do with the one you drafted in.
IDP leagues. Your lineup starts individual defensive players and our board doesn't price them. We'd grade half your roster and guess at the rest.
Keeper leagues. A kept player wasn't a decision made on draft night — the league assigned the round. We'd call somebody an idiot for the best move they made all year.
Under six teams, over sixteen. Grades are a curve across the room. Too few and there's nothing to curve; too many and the board stops pricing sensibly.
Some leagues draft like a normal snake and score like something else entirely. Guillotine is the clearest case — the draft looks ordinary to us, so it comes straight through the front door, but you drafted for weekly survival in a format where depth is nearly worthless and we'd grade you against a season-long board. Sleeper doesn't flag it, so we can't catch it. Same goes for house rules the platform never sees. If that's your league, the grades will be built on the wrong market, and we'd rather you knew that here than found out in the report.
Once the season starts, the Booth files every Tuesday morning: the matchup that actually mattered gets the full treatment, the four that didn't get the dismissal they earned, a power table with a point of view, and the ledger — every crime since draft night, still accruing. THE BOOTH SEASON PASS is $49 for one league, one season — everyone in the league reads free, forever. Put the Booth on your league.